Midterm Update

Pete Wentz look-alike is bisexual and he wants the world to know! In case you somehow forgot about his shocking (and somewhat inconceivable) admission that he digs guys and girls, Pete was seen working his game on a pint-sized Brittany babe this week. According to close sources, Pete was overheard propositioning her, while clearly lurking inside her personal bubble. "If you ever need a boyfriend, I'm here for you" he said, as he led her into increasingly pervy conversation. Unfortunately for our manly, manly, man, this pot-loving pixie already might have a relationship going on--with a girl! Atleast that's the impression we got when Pete asked if she had had sex with her East Tower girl friend (or girlfriend?).

Anyone find a backpack filled with some funky fungi? (No, this backpack did not contain lettuce from the Courtyard Cafe--we mean something more along the lines of a psychedelic treat). Well, some security guards did! Don't worry though, the owner of this backpack, who was none other than the blonde Brittany bro of questionable sexuality, was spared of any official retribution (wish we could have said the same about the recently evicted 3N candy king). The contents of the backpack, however, were not saved. If you're dying for some of that psilocybin due to the shortage of psychedelics around here, you can try searching through the trash--maybe the hot janitor (HOOK ME UPPPP) will help you!

Enjoy your spring break, and for those of you still on campus, give us the goss! thegrapedutchess@gmail.com

Love You Muchess,
The Grape Dutchess